https://joscha.substack.com/p/on-the-jeffrey-epstein-affair
Joscha,
thank you for sharing your thoughts. as a fan of your research and to help me reconcile with the news, i conducted a thought experiment, considering a hypothetical “worst-case” scenario that these emails seem to be an evidence for — that is, what if you are a bad person? how does that change my relational attitude towards you and your research moving forward?
it seems like the emails suggest that you might be racist, sexist (among other -ism). alright, this is uncomfortable possible truth to sit with, however, admittedly it is also unsurprising to my belief system.
let me expand:
i believe we all have bits of racism, sexism, and all of those “-isms” stored in our human forms. at least, i surely am aware of those present within my human organism. i don’t find it surprising — after all, who i am is a memory - a collection of conditionings and memories that construct my self. the memories i store within me are dark - my homecontry being at war, my dad dismissing my mom’s emotional intelligence, my girlfriends implicitly swiping left on darker dates. while i can do my best at consiously controlling my impulses, i also recognize that much of my behaviour is unconsious and with the dark memories like above, i am certain much of me is not a benevolent expression.
knowing that it takes a long time for humans to heal ancestoral trauma and unlearn past behaviour, i suspect it will take many more generations to unpluck those -isms out of our human complex systems and the world will keep being evil.
“okay well if we all have these -isms in us, why don’t we see it often? my friends and family and all feel quite angels to me,” you might wonder. yes, it is true that there is barely any evidence for the claim [1] that my belief system is making, however i believe it is exactly because of the argument you articulated in one of your CIMC talks, and that is “it takes deep pshychological safety to express our inner most parts and most of the weirdest research happens in safe cocoons of unconditionally loving friends and family, if one is lucky to have such environment.” this rings true to me based on my personal n=1 observation - it is only once i started feeling safe with my partner and my homies, that i observed the ugly parts awaken in me. it as as if the pshychological safety enables the bully, the racist, the sexist in me.
elsewise, it is much safer to play the average game of “i am an angel who transcended the -isms of the past. it is so old school to be x-ist.” such game keeps you alive (no social death) and well-respected by majority of population.
continuing the thought experiment, i actually start to appreciate emails coming out because it suggests that you are possibly a continiuum too - with “goods” and “bads” in you. if i only see angels around me, i have a harder time trusting their realness.
i also think there is a power in bland ugly statements you make - they help us understand what the Current State is and it through awareness of this Current State we can effectively design a strategy towards Desired State. so often we leave the ugly truths unnamed and invisible - still influencing the world of today, but too scared to name them. once you name those implicit rules, you unveil the power to tweak them up. (similarly: once i become aware of the ugly parts within me, i have a power to transform them. awarenes first, change second)
however, it is important to keep those ugly truths within the bounds of that safe space, mitigating the chance of them being weaponized (just as you suggested) and i doubt Epstein guy belongs in this safe space. i am curious what is your updated belief on this - is he a guy who could safely hold ugly truths and contribute towards a beautiful version of the world that you’d like to see?
okay, so where does this experiment (that hypothesises you are -ist) take me re my updated attitude towards you & your research? well, curiously there is simultaneouly an increase in trust points (because you are just a real human with goods and bads) but also decrease in my trust (because yes there was some lapse of judgement re audience of your email). my attitude to you is now more fragmented: i am keen to continue follow your AI research, and i feel less trust towards the network of yours.
i love observing the many teachings this brought up in me and the world around you. this teaches me to always do due diligence and that even the brightest humans can still fall into classic human fallacies, like band wagon of accepting money because your buddies did so too. i thank you for these teachings and i wish you space and unconditional love as you move through healing and discernment of the many stimuluses that come into your monkey field.